Some of the criticism about Mary is she didn't look old enough and she looked as if she was having a Vietnam flashback. I had another go at drawing her using things I see in old people, such as the glasses on the chain and the lines around the mouth and eyes. I'll be starting on Simon soon as he looked like he was high on sugar and also he looks a bit odd to me and I can't explain why (I think it may be something to do with the clay model I'm using as reference)
I have also made some changes with the animatic, cutting out most of the walking where I can after being reminded that I would need to animate all that walking. I also changed a couple more things to be more snappy. I looked at the scene from Hot Fuzz where Nicolas Angel tools up in the evidence locker and tried to mimic how he takes things.
Premise Script v1 by Ollie Thacker on Scribd This is the first iteration of the story for my premise project. At first I thought I would do a story based on making gold, as that was the action my character was doing in my Character Design project. However I thought a pilot episode where the character makes his sidekick character. I'm also considering writing the gold making episode as an additional episode. The reason why is because I'd like to do my project as a pitch in order to get this show made into a real tv show. I definitely know there are some things that need changing, especially since this is the first draft of this script. Also I'm hoping that the writing of the script will help me come up with a name for the show, something which I am struggling with at the moment.
Please read - https://ucarochester-cgartsandanimation.blogspot.com/2019/09/fao-caa-years-2-3-your-timetables-are.html
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